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Holy Snitsky Empire Wanderers thread

Bobby

The Legend
//The Sun

ABREHART SEX IN CAR PARKS



THIS photo reveal the shameful sex secret of “dogging” fan Ben Abrehart.

The HSEW defender, pictured in a car park as he prowled around for casual sex with strangers, was talking to two Sun reporters posing as man and wife.

The centerback, also an Empire international, confessed he had been cruising around car parks for two years. He described dogging as “addictive” and:

BRAGGED about his first experience.

DETAILED the “etiquette” of the practice, which is outlined on websites that also give participants locations for meetings.

DESCRIBED how some want to have group sex in the open air or in cars, some prefer to romp while being watched and others just like to spectate.

INSULTED Rob Langdon.

CLAIMED he had a girlfriend who sometimes joined in, and

TOOK our undercover team on a tour of three more of his haunts near his home in Cannock, Staffs.

Abrehart, 22, told reporters: “It would be great to hook up with you whenever you are around and about.”

And soon afterwards he texted them to say: “If you fancy having some fun this evening, ill (I’ll) be at the cp (car park) where we met originally.”

In another text, he wrote: “Lucy is very attractive, and would love to get intimate with her but if you guys at first only want to be watched, then that’s fine.”

Yesterday he sent a third saying: “Why don’t you come out this evening?” In a mobile conversation with Syson later, he said he was willing to meet Lucy on her own — and could give her a good time.

The star — an imposing 6ft 2in — approached our pair and asked: “Are you playing this evening?”

He gave them a rundown on dogging, saying it attracted both singles and couples, mainly professionals such as doctors and lawyers.

Asked what would happen if they “played,” he replied: “You don’t do anything you don’t want to do. If you chat to somebody and get on well, they may say, ‘Do you want to go somewhere a bit quieter?’ which is maybe a car park with two cars instead of 200.

“Inevitably you will get a lot of single guys. If you are not interested just turn your engine over as if you are going to reverse and they will move. If you say ‘no thanks’ they get the message.”

Describing his first time, he said: “I pulled up next to a car and there were two guys in the front, two girls in the back. I got out and stood there and before you knew it everything was going off.”
 

shokz

The Red Devil

(H)(Y)
 

Bobby

The Legend
Wanderers 4
John 14
John 37
John 54
Daivari 90
Sharpe s/o 72

Rhinos 3

The first match of the season was a firey affair even before the kick off, with Bobby Brandon and a Rhino's player getting into a scuffle in the tunnel, which led to Bob Malcolm being sent off before the game started for punching a player in the face.

The game started off fast, Daivari destroying Rhinos up the right wing, and it was always going to be Wanderers scoring first John with a tap-in thanks to Ewan and Brandon's hardwork, the play could have been brought back after Brandon went through his man - a move which pleased Gene Snitsky.

A little later Wanderers won a corner, Brandon sent it in for the head of Mengerink who sent it to the edge of the area for Sharpe's onetime volley deflecting off John, 2-0 Wanderers, John's 2nd of the game although he knew very little about it.

Right before the 2nd half, Rhino's pulled one back, Abrehart's mistake leading to a shot. Snitsky with no chance.

Right from the kickoff Wanderers were caught napping as Rhinos made it 2-2, a header for with Ko had no chance to defend.

Stern John made a solo run in the 54th minute, beating the entire defense to get the lead back, 3-2 at that moment as the striker made no mistake from 10 yards.

John would go off after that, Nick Stott seeing a chance.

Rhinos soon got a break in the 67th minute, Brandon fell down and Abrehart failed to clear, leaving the man unmarked to score Rhinos 3rd, and the equalizer.

Things got worse for Wanderers as Sharpe too exception to a push on Ko by a Rhinos man, leveling him with a right hand, and Sharpe was given the walk of shame.

Wanderers had to absorb alot of attack from that point, and were only able to muster a chance in stoppage time. Brandon taking the ball up, every one going forward before Brandon's ball picked out Daivari who beat 3 defenders and unleashed a stunning strike. 4-3 Wanderers on the last kick of the ball.

HSEW: (4-4-2)
Snitsky; Ko, Koh, Abrehart, Brandon; Daivari, Sharpe, Azzizada, Ewan; John (Stott 58), Menegrink
Unused Subs: T. Goalkeeper, S. Tobin, P. Flores, M. Hall
 
not the result we wanted, but still not bad considering it was our first match of the season and it's very hard to play at Snitsky International. We will get revenge come May 15th when they come to the ROC and the 585, if they even have the courage to show up.
 

Bobby

The Legend
Des Moines 2-3 HSEW
- Cup Round 1
HSEW: John 12, Brandon (pen) 64, Crouch 77

HSEW:
T. Goalkeeper

Ko
Koh
Hall
Brandon

Acadamy Player (Malcolm, 88)
Abrehart
Azzizada (Wanchope, 72)
Ewan (Tobin, 88)

John (cpt)
Crouch

Subs unused: Thornton (GK), Stott
Banned: Sharpe (red card in previous match)
Injured: Snitsky, Daivari
 

Jambo Den

Fan Favourite
Hail Snitsky: A holy prayer said by Snitskyholics to atone for their "sintskies". The Hail Snitsky is recited as follows:

"Hail Snitsky, full of badassery
It wasn't your fault
Foremost art thou amongst asskickers
And cursed is the fruit of Lita's womb, Adam Copeland Jr.
Holy Snitsky, champion of women,
Kick the asses of those babykillers now
And smash their throats with a steel chair
Amen."
 

shokz

The Red Devil
Gene Snitsky acquires Nigerian citizenship; earns first cap.
The American-born goalkeeper Gene Snitsky was called up to the Eagles squad by the stand-in coach and ex-player Samson Siasia in May 2005, just a week after being granted Nigerian citizenship.

Appropriately enough, his debut match was against the USA and the Holy Snitsky Empire Wanderers skipper crowned a superb debut performance by scoring the winner in the dieing seconds of stoppage time, volleying home a Jay Jay Okocha corner from the edge of the box.

This season he has been in excellent form for Holy Snitsky Empire Wanderers, showing off his huge muscular build, outstanding goalkeeping capabilities and reflexes. A number of ex-professionals, pundits and experts around the globe believe he will go down as perhaps the greatest goalkeeper of his generation yet he still opted to play for Nigeria.

"I don't regret choosing to play for Nigeria," Snitsky said. "I've always been well treated by the Nigerian people and it will be a pleasure to play here, tell me who turns down the chance to team up with world class stars such as Jay Jay Okocha, Nwankwo Kanu and the great, legendary Celestine Babayaro?"

"I was born in the United States of America and it would be a lie to say that I'm just Nigerian now and not American but I love Nigeria and I love playing for the national team."

"Right now I'm just concentrating on earning my next cap for Nigeria and scoring more goals."

He will now captain Nigeria on a regular basis.
 

Bobby

The Legend
Western Railway 1-2 HSEW
WR: Rodriguez 8'
SE: John 32', Gral (pen) 65'

Western started the match out on fire, with 10 shots in the first 20 minutes. They scored on a well worked effort that found Rodriguez in the box.

Brandon's cross evaided thne head of Arash, but Stern was a class above latching on to it with a diving header to make it 1-1.

In the 2nd half Bobby Brandon was torn down in the area by the Railway defender, the ref pointed to the spot, Gral dispatched it with precision.
 

Bobby

The Legend
Yes, we played a 4-5-1 because we needed to take the sting out, you're in the next squad.

Stern is the #1 striker.
 

Jambo Den

Fan Favourite
Well, if it wasn't obvious already, I'd like to welcome Rodrigo Gral to the squad. A wonderful addition.

He's proposed a sushi only diet :(
 

Jambo Den

Fan Favourite


Wanderers secure services of Pressley and Gral

"Holy Snitsky Empire Wanderers Football Club" (referred to as "HSEW", "Wanderers" or "the club")

Holy Snitsky Empire Wanderers Football Club is delighted to announce the arrivals of Stephen Pressley and Rodrigo Gral to the club.

Stephen Pressley has signed on a one year deal, which will see him working at HSEW in a coaching role with the option to play as a stand-in defender in times of squad crisis. He was signed as Gene Snitsky valued Pressley, referred to as Elvis, as an "experienced, model professional" and as a "hot prospect in the world of coaching", believing that his influence will have a great effect on the youngsters coming through.

Rodrigo Gral has been signed on a loan deal until the end of the season from Jubilo Iwata. This signing news has come in the light of intense media speculation as regards the signing of a new striker to the club. Bobby Brandon identified Gral as a "prolific striker, who is certain to wow the Wanderers' fans with his classy displays laced with flair."

The club refused to comment further on these matters.
 

Jambo Den

Fan Favourite
It's Not My Fault" - A work of Snitsky.

It's not my fault you fell in love

It's not my fault that it came from above

It's not my fault Edge and Lita chose this direction

It's not my fault Kane can't get an erection

It's not my fault the things that love can do to us

Just like,

It's not my fault you had a dead baby in your uterus


Robert Burns. William Blake. Walt Whitman. Emily Dickinson. Edgar Allen Poe. Philip Larkin. William Wordsworth. Rudyard Kipling. And now, Gene Snitsky.

Beautiful :(
 


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