pooing on foreign territory (sponsered by fc infesta)

[Back Door Skip]

This issue may have been already discussed, but how bad is it when you are desperate to shit, sit down and let go, then realize there is no toilet paper. What are different coping strategies for such situations? Let us assume a messy bar shit when you are slightly intoxicated and the bathroom is busy.

That happened to me the other day. I was getting ready to sacrifice my undershirt, but then I thought of the unthinkable... I rummaged through the trash can and realized that people are extremely wasteful of toilet paper. I was able to find enough clean paper to wipe my ass thoroughly. I still got home and showered three times and sprayed holy water on my right hand, which was the one that went down under to make sure I'd expel the shit demons.

 

[yoyo913]

I was able to find enough clean paper to wipe my ass thoroughly.

Or paper that you thought was clean.

I think I'd use a sock in that case.

 

[Mandieta6]

I use my hand to save on tp.

 

[Sir Didier Drogba]

I have done both what Alex outlined and what Skip outlined. The bin toilet paper is nasty though, it is there because women have used it to dry their vaginas if it is a unisex toilet and if it is the mens it is there because it has been used to wipe piss droplets from the seat.

 

[MaestroZidane]

That happened to me the other day. I was getting ready to sacrifice my undershirt, but then I thought of the unthinkable... I rummaged through the trash can and realized that people are extremely wasteful of toilet paper. I was able to find enough clean paper to wipe my ass thoroughly. I still got home and showered three times and sprayed holy water on my right hand, which was the one that went down under to make sure I'd expel the shit demons.

I can't even imagine myself doing such a thing

 

[Sir Didier Drogba]

The best solution is to call out to people outside the cubicle and ask for assistance, but this can backfire as they may tell the story to the entire bar. Also, there may not be any people. I have gambled on no-one else coming in when places have been very empty and left the cubicle with my pants around my ankles to get paper towels from by the sink. Once I actually tore up the brown cardboard cylinders from the inside of the toilet roll and used them, that was rough.

 

[Bobby]

Gonna start carrying one of those travel-sized packages of kleenex just in case.

 

[MaestroZidane]

I use that to be able to clean my nose, but I will now be carrying it for emergency bathroom purposes thats for sure.

 

[Sir Didier Drogba]

It is what I would like to do, but organization has never been my strong point. I did carry those in Africa, due to the obvious scarcity of toilet paper and extreme likelihood of diarrhea.

 

[Alex]

I always very wet wipes in Asia for the same reasons. Also used socks before as someone mentioned, and not used pure cardboard, but used it with the tiniest bit of paper covering it and cardboard just as an insulating layer.

Never used paper from the bin.

Also done the shuffle to the next cubicle before. That's ideal, but not always possible.

 

[Sir Didier Drogba]

Ever tried to squeeze through that gap under the wall separating the cubicles?

 

[Alex]

Ever tried to squeeze through that gap under the wall separating the cubicles?

No. And I wouldn't. I'd rather just go around. The cubicle you're squeezing into would be open anyway

 

[Jaboldinho]

What the fuck guys. I've never had this sort of situation, and assumed it was the case for most.

 

[Mandieta6]

I assume that due to the climate in Finland, shits are less viscuous and do not pose as much of a threat in regards to clean-up.

 

[Alex]

What the fuck guys. I've never had this sort of situation, and assumed it was the case for most.

You've never had a shit creep up on you without warning, in a public place? Or you've never been to a public toilet that has no toilet paper? I do always check, but sometimes it's unavoidable - you just need to go.

 

[Jaboldinho]

Nope.

 

[Alex]

Neither? You've never had a shit creep up on you in public!?

 

[Jaboldinho]

I don't think so.

 

[Alex]

In that case, I think you're the weirdo, not us.

Either that or your diet is really boring (no meat or anything that's a chance of going off) and exactly the same every day.

 

[Sir Didier Drogba]

Do you work, Jabo? Or go to school? Are you honestly telling me that you have never in the course of an 8 hour work day or school day not felt the need to shit? Or are you one of those weirdos that holds it in for hours damaging your colon just so you dont have to risk someone overhearing your expulsion?