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Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

P

pasion1

Senior Squad
FUNNY SITE!!!!!
(This guy is a fanatic of Star Wars and reviews all his movies in "script" form

http://ter.air0day.com/?script=revengeofthesith

Read the other Star Wars reviews too.....they are really good

(note: He rips on EVERY movie he reviews.....even if he gave it a perfect score <which he did for this flick>

here's a sample of the review.


CLONE TROOPER
He's dead. Nobody could have
survived that fall. Except a Jedi,
of course.

EWAN MCGREGOR
Jesus, they've become really
stupid. This movie really DOES
bridge the gap between the original
trilogy and the prequel trilogy.

or I liked this one

EWAN MCGREGOR
I will attempt to destroy you now,
without waiting for my support
troops to arrive.

GENERAL GREVIOUS
(coughing)
Are you serious? You've lost
literally every single duel you've
been a part of except for the one
with Darth Maul. Hayden constantly
mentions how many times he has saved
you. What have you done in the
entire prequel trilogy so far to
prove that you're actually a decent
fighter?




but this is loooong. so enjoy. (Also check out the Mortal Kombat 2 Review......classic)
 
I

INFESTA

Official
Great link, pasion1!

Here's my fav part:

NATALIE'S SHIP lands and she runs to HAYDEN.

NATALIE PORTMAN
Hayden! I heard you've gone toward
the dark side! It's not true, is it?
Why are your eyes all red?

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN
(furrowing his brow)
You brought Ewan, didn't you? To
actually act well and make me look
wooden and awful!

NATALIE PORTMAN
Of course not! I'm even worse than
you in this movie, why would I bring
someone capable of acting well here?



Another classic:

A CGI MEDICAL DROID is delivering NATALIE'S CHILDREN.
Another CGI DROID talks to EWAN and JIMMY SMITS.

JIMMY SMITS
Jesus, not every scene needs some
digital character in them. She's
giving birth, can't we leave at
least a FEW frames of the film free
from CGI bull****? Hell, Ewan chould
have delivered the twins, that would
be more dramatic.

DIRECTOR GEORGE LUCAS
More what?

MEDICAL DROID
She's dying. She has given up the
will to live.

EWAN MCGREGOR
Given up the will to live? She does
know she has two brand new babies to
live for, doesn't she?
 
S

Sir Calumn

Guest
Haha, good stuff (Y)

This is my favourite bit, rather long but absolutely brilliant:

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN runs up to SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING
Carlos*SON

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN
Samuel, I rented the original Star
Wars trilogy from Blockbuster. I'm
pretty sure Ian McDiarmid is a Sith
Lord.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON
Then it's time to get medieval on
some ass.

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN
Let me come with you.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON
No, go your room.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON and some OTHER JEDI go to
see IAN. Meanwhile HAYDEN stares out the window of the JEDI
TEMPLE, toward NATALIE PORTMAN'S APARTMENT. Though he says
nothing, we can see that he is conflicted, trying to decide
between his commitment to the Jedi order and his love for
his wife. NATALIE, at the same time, gazes toward the Jedi
Temple, wondering what will happen to her husband.

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN
How pathetic is it that the best
acted scene between us is the one in
which we are in separate buildings
and have no lines?

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON enters IAN MCDIARMID'S
CHAMBER.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON
Ian, you're under arrest for being
a manipulative motherfûcker.

IAN MCDIARMID
I got a threshold, Jedi. I got a
threshold for the abuse I'll take.
And right now I'm a race car and you
got me in the red. I'm just saying
that it's fûckin' dangerous to have
a racecar in the fûckin' red. It
could blow.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON
Oh, you're gettin' ready to blow?

IAN MCDIARMID
I could blow.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON
Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-layin'
motherfûcker, motherfûcker! Every
time my fingers touch my lightsaber
I'm Superfly TNT. I'm the Guns of
Navarone.

Suddenly, IAN pulls out his LIGHTSABER. He moves toward the
JEDI, pulls his arm back, aims at a Jedi, kills him, pulls
his blade out, moves toward another, and slowly kills him
too, all while SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON twirls his
lightsaber around pointlessly behind them. Once only SAMUEL
is left, they DUEL. IAN makes silly faces and is eventually
beaten. HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN arrives.

SAMUEL L. MOTHERFÛCKING Carlos*SON
Let me read to you from the book of
Ezekiel for a--

Suddenly, IAN unleashes some force lightning on SAMUEL,
which he absorbs into his lightsaber and somehow pushes back
onto IAN, which causes him to grow old, apprently.
Click to expand...
 
P

pasion1

Senior Squad
yeah i know....the site is so awesome (it actually got published in all these magazines when the guy did his Episode 1 Review (which is also great)

In all 6 star Wars reviews, everytime someone absorbs the lightning with their saber (well only in Ep 2 and 3) they always say...."man....someone REALLY should let Luke know about this: :funny:

love that

Also this from Episode 1...

"Finally DARTH MAUL shows up for a prolonged fight sequence.
Darth wears black boots, a black cloak, a black shirt, has a
red lightsaber, wears red and black face paint, and has
horns. He is EVIL."

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>..
this is what I was talking about. my fave part of the MK2 Review....just gold.

MORTAL KOMBAT 2: ANNIHILATION: THE ABRIDGED SCRIPT™

EXT. SHAOLIN TEMPLE

ROBIN SHOU
Well, that’s over with! What a
relief! Wait a minute, who are you
people?

JAMES REMAR
I’m Rayden.

SANDRA HESS
No you’re not.

ROBIN SHOU
Who...?

SANDRA HESS
Sonya. New cast. Never mind.

ROBIN SHOU
Odd. The last movie made over $100
million. Why would most of the cast
bail on the sequel?

Suddenly this question is answered.

BRIAN THOMPSON
Muwahahaha!! Through a loophole in
the tournament rules, I’m taking
over your world! Now, meet my
menacing underlings!

MUSETTA VANDER
Sindel!

DERON MCBEE
Motaro!

MARJEAN HOLDEN
Sheeva!

Most of the AUDIENCE, thinking they’ve accidentally walked
into a POWER RANGERS movie, leaves.
 
T

Torontolynx

Youth Team
EEENEEEYway. Just saw it today. Tied with ROTJ for the best one, in my opinion. I'm waiting for the DVD so I can see whether or not the Lizard really died...LOL.

but luke went to ask "your mother, your real mother" , no?
Click to expand...
Liea THOUGHT that Organa was her real mother. She didn't know she was adopted...did she? If it was padme she was talking about...it wouldn't make ANY sense at all. :nape:

About Liea being a princess
Click to expand...
She was the adopted daughter of the queen of Alderaan right? So that makes her a princess. I think...I may be wrong...that the woman (the good-guy senator's wife) is the queen.
 
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