Two years ago, I was into a busy campus caffeteria/store(like a bakery, with a built in caffeteria) looking for something to eat. I was wearing a light green T-shirt that said on the back, "Let's play carpenter. First we get hammered, then I nail you." Specifically, I wanted some Danish Croissants(with butter) which tasted really good. When I entered the store, I rushed over to pick up two but a group of 3 chicks had just stocked up and all that was left was the croissants with jam, whose taste I did not like. So I decided to ask the cashier for some change and get a chocolate bar from a vending machine instead.
When I get to the cashier, I was standing in front of that same group of 3 chicks who robbed me of my first choice for the afternoon. When I got the to line, I edged them out but was behind a lot of people. After around 5 minutes, I was ready to get my change. Now, the three behind me did not see what I was holding in my hand(i.e. nothing) as I was facing forward. They said something about my shirt and laughed, while I pretended not to hear while facing foward(back to them). When I got to the front of the line, I turned sideways towards the cashier and they saw that I had nothing.....now they were talking about something a lot for those 5 minutes, in line, but stopped when they realised that I hadn;t bought any food(they picked up some yogurt boxes to go with the croissants). I decided to make their lives uncomfortable....I put both my hands in my Carlos*et pockets and crouched my shoulders.
When asking for change, ordnarily, one would say can I have change for a dollar?
me(to the cashier): "Change...dollars 1!"
cashier(blonde): "Excuse me?"
me: "DOLLARS....1!!"
cashier: "Sorry, could you pease speak up sir? I can;t understand you."
One of the 3 chicks behind me(brunette, the other two were blondes): "I think he wants change."
I turned and gave an evil look to the one who said that.
cashier: "Do you still need some help?"
me(while turning my head towards the three standing behind me): "What she said."
At the same time, I yawned, pulled out both my hands and stretched fully extending my hands, with my left hand moving above the heads of the three behind me. Then, quickly, I put my hands down and (with my left hand) pointed towards the brunette and said (louder than earlier),"WHAT SHE SAID!" Infact I extended my left hand so much that my finger almost poked her in one of her eyes...it was getting closer towards her eyes, when she realized that it might poke her and fell backwards like a pile of bricks, extending her arms on either side(whatever for), and (in the process of falling towards the ground) knocked her two friends down to the floor with her.
cashier(leaning over the counter and saying to the three on the floor): "are you ok?"
me(facing cashier): "CAN I PLEASE HAVE CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR?"
The cashier(with a disgusted look on her face, jerked open the change drawer and game me the necessary change for my dollar.)
me: "can you count it for me, my eyes are watering, I can;t see clearly."
She counted the change and I collected the coins. The three chicks got up and proceeded towards the counter (yogurt packets and my croissants intact).
cashier: "next"
me: "first"
The cashier inquired again if they were ok. I moved aside(but while still facing them) and took my own time putting the change into my wallet. As I turned away from them and was about to walk away, the brunette says "What a jerk!"
I turned around (tears in eyes from the yawn, hence blurred everything) and opened my mouth like as if I was about to eat something and started blinking my eyes repeatedly while shaking my head from side to side(to make it seem like I wastrying to get rid of the tears so I could see them clearly), said "I hate it when that happens!". I then said to the cashier "She remind me of my TV....a noisy idiot!" and walked away while the three of them started saying "Some people can be such jerks", "what a jerk" and "how rude".-ALIENATION 101
EDIT: It says the same thing on the front and back of the shirt.
