It didn't fit. Here's part 2.
'Knight saved it with his back arm' - IAN BROWN
'The silence is getting louder.' - DAVE WOODS
'A full-blooded encounter for a number of reasons, many of them illegitimate.' - JOHN CHAMPION
'These Scottish players are very ordinary. In fact they have no names.' - HAMMED ADIO (Zimbabwean TV)
'It's Denmark 3 Denmark 0...' - IAN BROWN
'He was in the right place at the right time, but he might have been elsewhere on a different afternoon.' - TONY GUBBA
'That's lifted the crowd up into the air.' - BARRY DAVIES
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.' - MIKE INGHAM
'Jean Tigana has spent the entire first half inside Liam Brady's shorts.' - JIMMY MAGEE
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him... Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - MIKE INGHAM
RON ATKINSON : 'Unfortunately it goes right down the goalkeeper's throat...'
JOHN HELM : '...where it hits him on the knees.'
'He had to get down low to save that one on the ground' - BARRY DAVIES
'Rangers are definitely on the back heel now' - ARCHIE MACPHERSON
'The crowd... a cacophony of colour' - PETER DRURY
'Victor Hernandez, like an orchestral conductor directing his troops...' - JON CHAMPION
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - ALAN GREEN
'In this sort of match, whoever scores the most goals wins' - PORTUGUESE COMMENTATOR
'Benfica scored one in the first half, Boavista scored one in the second half, Benfica wasn't able to score anything in the second half, that makes 1-1, so the score is correct.' - PORTUGUESE COMMENTATOR
'Paneira with his unmistakable style... but no, it's not him' - PORTUGUESE COMMENTATOR
'Viv Anderson has pissed a fatness test.' - JOHN HELM
'The substitutes are all on the bench, and that's where they'll start the match.' - BARRY DAVIES
'It's deja vu all over again.' - GARY BLOOM
'He's pulling him off! The Spanish manager is pulling his captain off' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'When I said they'd scored two goals, of course I meant they'd scored one.' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'At the beginning it was a 90 minute game, at halftime it was a 45 minute game and now it's even shorter.' - ABC COMMENTATOR
'Madrid are like a rabbit dazed in the headlights of a car, except this rabbit has a suit of armour, in the shape of two precious away goals.' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'He had no chance of beating Schmeichel from there, but it was always worth a try.' - ALAN PARRY
'Ardiles strokes the ball like it was a part of his anatomy.' - JIMMY MAGEE
'As the seconds tick down, Belgium are literally playing in time that doesn't exist.' - GUY MOWBRAY
'I'm sure coach Frank Rijkaard will want the Dutch to go on and score a fourth now - although obviously they'll have to score the third one first.' - ANGUS LOUGHRAN
'He's showed him the left leg, then the right. Where's the ball, the defender asks? It's up his sleeve.' - CLIVE TYLDESLEY
'And Swansea have an uphill mountain to climb now.' - JOHN HARDY
'There’s 30 minutes gone and we’re in the first quarter of the game.' - JON CHAMPION
'He's scored the winning goal three minutes after being sent off' - CANADIAN COMMENTATOR
'Lampard, as usual, arrived in the nick of time, but it wasn't quite soon enough.' - ALAN PARRY
'Ziege hits it high for Heskey who isn't playing' - ALAN GREEN
'There's always one [FA Cup 3rd round upset] and the egg at the moment is heading squarely for Charlton's door' - STEVE WILSON
'Here he comes... with his left foot' - RON JONES
'The Baggio brothers, of course, are not related.' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'What that situation really needed was a little eyebrows.' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'Xavier, who looks just like Zeus, not that I have any idea what Zeus looks like...' - ALAN GREEN
'Silvestre has had the whites of the goal in his eyes ever since...' - IAN DARKE
'They (Bayern Munich) lost in the semi-finals of the Champions League to Real Madrid last year, and the year before that were beaten in the final by Manchester United, so their European pedigree is second to none.' - SIMON BROTHERTON
'There's Ottmar Hitzfeld, the two year old Bayern Munich manager.' - MIKE HILL
'There's no end to the stoppage of this drama' - ALAN PARRY
George Hamilton: 'Roy Carsley has it.'
Jim Beglin: 'Lee Carsley, George.'
George Hamilton: 'Ah yes, perhaps it's because his head reminds me of Ray Wilkins.'
'We don't really know what Iran are capable of when the gun is put to their head' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'Shay Given almost single-handedly won the match for Newcastle against Everton, although obviously he didn't score the goals' - GEORGE HAMILTON
'We are about as far away from the penalty box as the penalty box is from us.' - TOM TYRRELL
'And the average age of Arsenal defense is over 100 years' - TVB Pearl (Hong Kong) commentator
'One or two of their players aren't getting any younger' - CLIVE TYLDESLEY
'Saravakos centers for Saravakos...' - MANOLIS MAVROMATIS
'Corner from a good position.' - MANOLIS MAVROMATIS
'Stockport usually play at Edgeley Park, but this time they've come to Maine Road, because, um, this is an away game' - OSKU LAUKKANEN
'Chris Waddle is off the field at the moment, exactly the position he is at his most menacing.' - GERALD SINSTADT
'It's Ipswich 0 Liverpool 2, and if that's the way the score stays then you've got to fancy Liverpool to win.' - PETER JONES
'It’s a tough month for Liverpool over the next five or six weeks.' - ALAN GREEN
'Luckily Macclesfield have three or four supporters running back into the box to defend' - JOHN MURRAY
'Halifax against Spurs, the original David against Goliath confrontation' - JOHN HELM
'So often the pendulum continues to swing with the side that has just pulled themselves out of the hole' - TONY GUBBA
'Numero Eins, as they say in Germany' - PETER JONES
'He had an eternity to play that ball, but he took too long over it.' - MARTIN TYLER
'Billy Bingham will have to put his thinking boots on' - Commentator
'Butcher goes forward as Ipswich throw their last trump card into the fire' - BRYON BUTLER
'He had two stabs at the cherry' - ALAN GREEN
'Ibrox is filling up slowly, but rapidly' - JAMES SANDERSON
'He put it just where he meant it and it passed the Luxembourg goalpost by 18 inches' - BRYON BUTLER
'It's a game of two teams.' - PETER BRACKLEY
'Real possession football, this. And Zico's lost it' - JOHN HELM
'Wilkins sends an inch perfect pass to no one in particular' - BRYON BUTLER
'He's marked his entrance with an error of some momentum' - BARRY DAVIES
'Ritchie has now scored 11 goals, exactly double the number he scored last season' - ALAN PARRY
'Wigan Athletic are certain to be promoted barring a mathematical tragedy' - TONY GUBBA
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I've got a load from Kevin Keegan, who must be the master of the stupid football comments. But I'll post them later perhaps.
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ill post more later
