Guys' Rules...

Discussion in 'SG Players Lounge' started by Hans, Dec 15, 2006.

  1. Hans

    Hans How big is YOUR penis?

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    Guys' Rules*******************
    At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

    Finally, the guys' side of the story.
    (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
    We always hear "the rules"
    From the female side.


    Now here are the rules from the male side.
    These are our rules!
    Please note... these are all numbered "1"
    ON PURPOSE!

    1. Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
    or the changing of the tides.
    Let it be.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
    And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.

    See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
    Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    Or tell us how you want it done.
    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have < B>no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
    We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

    1. Don't ask us what we're th inking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
    or golf.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.
    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.​
     
  2. Parra Power

    Parra Power Manager

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    I think this has been posted here before.
     
  3. didy

    didy Red Card - 1-12-08 - Posting pornographic material Life Ban

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    kinda lame. real men don't need rules. we live like animals. :read:
     
  4. Theodorakis

    Theodorakis Banned

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    I've heard-read this several times but actually, I like it.. I dont mind reading it once again.. :)
     
  5. Run DMB

    Run DMB MVP

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    Meh... most of these are clichés we've heard a hundred times. I like this one though:
     
  6. Good_User

    Good_User Red Card - Life Life Ban

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  7. Joe Star

    Joe Star Starting XI

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    Why Do U Wanna Know?
    Is that you Lee?
     
  8. Help?

    Help? Fan Favourite

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    ROFL, you saying this makes it so much funnier
     
  9. MaestroZidane

    MaestroZidane YELLOW CARD: Untrustworthy

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    you're very pathetic indeed.. allright guys you heard him, keep it up so this piece of S** can leave this place... or was it the other way around?? hmmm
     
  10. Bobby

    Bobby The Legend

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    You're like herpes.
     
  11. Tom

    Tom That Nice Guy

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    See I liked that, made me laugh a few times.
     
  12. Help?

    Help? Fan Favourite

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    We should spray some Humus on that ****
     
  13. d3adly

    d3adly Senior Squad

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  14. rony31

    rony31 Team Captain

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    rules on guys being posted by a guy who started a thread about penis size... :(
     
  15. Hans

    Hans How big is YOUR penis?

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  16. Good_User

    Good_User Red Card - Life Life Ban

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  17. rony31

    rony31 Team Captain

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    fine, we'll just call you fat f*cking douche from now on.
     
  18. Theodorakis

    Theodorakis Banned

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    people like you instantly reminds me of a quote by albert einstein
     
  19. Help?

    Help? Fan Favourite

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    Bruce Lee a Korean and a Boxer!!!

    Best thing i heard all day
     
  20. bbranco10

    bbranco10 Senior Squad

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    hey i liked the post,it made me laugh
    was hoping there was some more rules to it though
     
      

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